Dear Diary,
Today was difficult for me – we both knew it would be. Fancy new job in a fancy high-rise office building in the fancy bit of fancy downtown. I only just bought this suit yesterday – I hope it doesn’t start to smell before my paycheque comes and I can afford to buy a couple more. And I know what you’re thinking, Diary (it would be concerning if I didn’t, come to thinking of it). You’re thinking that I’m overreacting, just stressing myself out over nothing. These people hired me, of course, they’re going to welcome me with open arms into their new company!
We were wrong, Diary. It was awful.
The people were nice enough, I suppose, and the building was gorgeous – I’d never seen so much glass frosting in the Melbourne area before. But the higher and higher I got in the stunning golden elevator, the more I felt my pulse rising, my sweat start to crawl out of my skin.
I eventually stumbled out on the sixty-something floor, gasping for breath and nearly collapsed. A few of my new co-workers ran over to help me, grabbing my arms and pulling me to a nearby chair. Lots of lumbar support. Vision going dark around the edges.
‘Can you tell me your name, son?’ one woman with kind eyes kept asking me. She reminded me of my grandmother. I must have said that out loud, because her eyes suddenly narrowed and she stormed off. Oops.
‘Answer something basic,’ a new, male voice asked me. I couldn’t see the guy, standing slightly to the right of where the void was encroaching on me. ‘Uh… where’s the best place to get decorative glass for an office around Melbourne?’
‘He’s not gonna know that!’ a third voice hissed.
I mumbled out an answer and the third voice let out a surprised grunt.
‘Hm,’ he said. ‘Whaddya know. I guess that’s why they hired him.’
‘This is the new guy?’ the man asked.
‘Apparently. Say, are you feeling a bit…’ the third voice trailed off.
So anyway, Diary. That’s the story of the carbon monoxide leak in my fancy new building on my very first day.